(Cross-posted with @mirz123)
I hate to be reactionary, and since I do not want to accuse anyone who may have been sincere, I will not name-names. However, I was recently approached by someone who stated they wanted me to be their muse and use my @mirz333 gallery as inspiration for a commission they were working on and would pay me. I said, "sure, but no payment required." However, it did not stop there. This person then seemingly ignored what I had said and stated we were in a "collaboration" and wanted me to accept a check payment for the commission -- wherein I would take my cut, then forward the difference to the artist. They then asked for my bank information and my mailing address. (They were also very insistent when I didn't answer their messages right away.)
As @ravenswd said, a new spin on an old scam.
A warning, NEVER give out your mailing address to a stranger. And certainly NEVER give out your banking information. There are secure ways to pay and get paid online, through Paypal and other services. I personally have commissioned hundreds of artists over the years and paid money to them (as well as receiving payment for a few commissions I did for others) and rarely had an issue. However, it was always secure transactions and never anything where I had to share personal information.
I should note, I have shared my mailing address with people who became my friends and we exchanged cards and art-gifts. However, never to anyone I hadn't gotten to know first, and certainly not anyone I had just met.
With respect to this artist -- I was worried at first that I would offend the person. I understand the situation may have been legitimate, which is why I was not nasty about it. I explained the situation and why I was doing what I did. However, never take a chance and do something risky for the sake of not-hurting-someone's-feelings.
For anyone who knows me knows that I used to be uber-active on DA and it was due to a scam wherein someone approached me about interest in my fiction series, that I fled the internet for years. The "interest" turned out to be a scam, and the fall-out was so bad I ended up deleting most of my online accounts. Granted, back then my situation was a bit more complicated, as I was in emotional and financial dire-straits -- dealing with my mother's cancer and losing my house in foreclosure -- and was easy pickings for a scammer. Still, these people target anyone under any circumstances.
So, breaking my semi-sabbatical for this PSA. It's a scary world. Keep safe and protect yourself.
There is great freedom discovering that what you think you need is in fact what you can live without. A shattered heart mends. I have changed my cover picture to reflect my mood. Things are not good, but people keep telling me I seem more at peace and happier. I guess I am -- at least a little. Still need to pick up the pieces in several spots in my life, but finally feel it is all going to be okay. (Psst, this is not about @ravenswd.)
*** Cross-posted with Mirz123 ***
Today is the first day of my leap of faith. Today is the end of an era.
I recently left my job of 5 years. A job that consumed so much of my time – I often worked 7 days a week, 10-12 hours a day – that I had lost myself. When I made a few stamps recently, my daughter said, “Mom, you used to do this all the time.” She was right.
I loved my job. I loved that I was able to help so many people. However, as many companies do, they started to move towards a more impersonal, money-oriented business model. Granted, they have every right to. I don’t ding them for that, it costs a lot to keep the lights on. But I have too much of a heart, and in corporate America, having a heart is a liability.
Anyhow, this was the job I had started after losing my house in foreclosure, when we literally had to leave 90% of what we owned behind and move to a city 200 miles away where we knew no one. I appreciated the opportunity, but it was a forced move – I had hoped to be at my former job until I retired. So, when I recently turned in my resignation, I could hear a door close. I felt that the nightmare was finally ending. A nightmare that lasted 10+ years – starting with the loss of my art and online identity (the wiping of my DA accounts), my life (my house and job of 25 years), and my dearest friends (Alicia and those I was forced to leave IRL and on DA). The fall-out was finally coming to an end.
A week ago, I pulled up When Worlds Collide 2, the collab I wrote with Endorell-Taelos. For the first time in many years, I had the desire to write. An authentic desire to finish that story. I have also been drawing. I do a daily sketch dump which has given me a lot of joy.
When doors close, others open. I do not have a job; I left without one. With the current staffing shortage, I don’t believe I will have trouble finding something, but it is still scary. Though, for once in my life I am taking a moment for me. Today was the first Saturday I have slept-in for years -- I worked on Saturdays 90% of the time. Today was the first time I didn’t worry about a stack sitting on my desk, feeling guilty I was not there tackling it. Today was the first time in a long time I felt like myself. Today was the first time in a long time I felt alive.
I have had a lot of false starts, coming back to DA, then leaving a minute later. I apologize. This past 12 years have been one living hell. But for the first time, I feel that things are finally going to be all right. I feel the worst is over. I feel relief.
Someone recently talked about re-booting in a real world context. That is what I feel this is. I am rebooting my life. I spent so much time working, I feared I wouldn’t know what to do with my time. I realize that I need to go back to the things I love, the person inside of me that I lost due to the stress of losing everything in the real world. I need to reboot my art and my writing, and trust that things will fall into place.
In the final months of my job, I was a wreck due to being overwhelmed, and I dropped the ball. Most of that was due to a staff shortage and having to juggle too many balls by myself, but mistakes are still mistakes. I have learned from them, and as I eventually find a new job, I know things will be better for me in that regard, too. I know things will fall into place.
Today, I feel the shackles have been broken. Today, I feel free.
I have talked about Sunflowers and Revolution. Figuratively, of course. Not so much a revolution in the French Revolution sense, but in a personal sense. (I should mention to ThreshTheSky I recently watched Les Miserables for the first time and loved it; I thought of him the whole time). I am talking about self-revolution, looking deep inside and changing how we see things, how we react, and where we are going. So, if you see sunflowers decorating my pages, know that at age 53 (in a few days), I am still trying to figure out who I am and trying to become the best me that I can. Follow the Sun, Follow the Truth. Meaning being authentic and true to who we are -- being honest with ourselves about what is going on around us.
I recently watched Joaquin Phoenix’s acceptance speech for his role in Joker. I was so touched; I felt I could have spoken it myself. Particularly with my growing journey towards full veganism. The main part of his speech was how, as humans, we are at our best helping each other. That touched me most. I still get emails to this day from kids – now adults – whom I supported here on DA and remember me. Who have gone on to make careers in art fields. That makes me so happy. That is what life is about, and what I need to get back to.
Again, I thank you all for your support. At one time I was a mini-legend on this site. That was stripped from me. But sometimes it is only after we lose everything that we are free to do anything (nods to Fight Club for that quote). I am the Phoenix, rising from the ashes. I do not know what the future holds, but I know it is out there waiting for me.
Oh, and by-the-way, I had heard some rumors that people thought Ravenwood and I were having marital problems. I can gladly say that is false. We will be married 30 years come January. He is the love of my life, my art partner and my life partner. I hope he will get active again with me. Thankfully, he has been busy writing while I was on this forced sabbatical. I look forward to all of you reading his recent solo works, which I think are great.
I am sorry this was so long. I know most of you don’t like reading long diatribes. But I hope you will forgive me. Thank you for taking the time to keep up with me, and hopefully support me during my true comeback.
Much affection always.
P.S. I want to send a thank-you to my 2 guardian angels. I know what you did for me, and I can only say I owe you the world. We have never formally met -- though I know we have seen each other -- but I am confident we will have a chat over coffee someday. Until then, when I say I owe you my life, I mean it. <3
Doing some work on my Chasers Series. Since I need to reference these, re-posting a couple of old commissions:
Espa and the Queen
From my Chaser's story. Espa is a tyrannical leader who falls in love with the queen. He doesn't care that she is married, he just enslaves her. LOL. Good times.
Art by @jen-and-kris
Beth Araden
An flight-instructor, Beth follows in her father's footsteps as leader of a rebel movement. Yeah, Chasers first started as a Star War fan-fic, but is so so much different now.
Art by @cristianaleone